Wednesday, November 30, 2005

I just had to email him


This is a copy of an email that I just had to send, but more importantly I had to share it with you, so you can start thinking and talking it over with God.

Note to the reader: This isn't a commentary on the event at Baylor, more my response to the general message I'm understanding from your writing found at http://www.newswithviews.com/PaulProctor/proctor82.htm .

I agree with this "Clearly, any man or woman who disobeys the physical laws God has established in this earthly domain risks dying a physical death, as evidenced by the tragic event at Baylor. It should also be noted that those who violate the spiritual laws of God risk death." (By the way, I find it interesting that you cut the quote from your writing short for the margin. I agree with the quote in the margin.)

I see all the scripture you have included. I think many of the scriptures you point out are commands for Christ followers. The prostitute, the tax collector, the diseased, the adulteress, the wedding party; these are the people that Christ encountered every day. He showed them love first. He had an interest in their lives, and He met a very real personal, physical, emotional need first. He met them where they were. Have you ever really thought about why He was accused of being a drunkard? I think it would be because He was hanging out with drunk people. He established a relationship with people (people that weren’t too highly regarded), then He invited them. The people He was the harshest with, were the religious types (aka the Pharisees). I think they were held to a higher standard because supposedly they knew God and God's ways. Ironically, all those years of learning, teaching, and prophesy (the Old Testament is full to the brim with it), and they were missing what was right in front of their eyes. Maybe for a person such as you, the "Emerging Church" doesn't offer enough meat, but it draws so many lost and searching people closer to God. I don't think every Christian church is for every Christian, every day. We are all God's children (believers or not), and some kids need milk for awhile, while other children at times can stomach a complex and full 7 coarse meal.

I would also like to address your concerns about acknowledging beauty and enjoyment. Everything God made was good. He designed everything. Yes the enemy does his best to distort anything good and perverse the good things...including us and God's word, but ultimately everything good came from God. I don't plan on worshipping the smell of my morning coffee, but to stop and enjoy that moment, thank God for that quiet moment, that simple pleasure. Can't we and shouldn't we honor God, praise God, point to God's glory, and say thank you to God for all the good things He has provided, the miraculous and the seemingly simple? Even when we are fasting, He tells us not to wear a long face and tell everyone how much we are going without. It should be in secret, something private between Him and me. Reading the scriptures and the context in which you use them in your writing, it sounds as if God wants us to be miserable here on earth. Interesting, because didn't He put us here? Didn't He send His Son here? Doesn't He desire for us to be joyful and receive His Love, His Living water. Isn't it through the beauty and mystery of Him (and all He has done and does) that constantly draws us to Him? His actions, His creation, His design…they are all good, because they are His, right?

I'm including the entire text of Matthew 6 and 9 and John 4 from the Amplified Bible Version obtained off of http://www.biblegateway.com/ I include the entire text, bible version, and resource so the reader can read it and determine the appropriateness of my reference, as well as hopefully give the reader a better understanding of God. These are examples of how I understand Jesus meeting flawed people, like you, me, anyone else who reads this or doesn't. It doesn't answer everything, nor do I, but I think the scriptures, what you have written, what I've written, things that many Christians and seekers have written, all show facets of God, and all show facets of our flawed selves. Thankfully there is God's grace, which is full of a lot of love, much patience, and all truth. Fortunately, God's grace can fill in the cracks between our words and I AM.

-thegirl

PS I’m posting this here www.dankimball.com/vintage_faith/ (where I found it) and here http://www.ianua.org/weblog.php?id=D20051116 (were dankimball found it) and I will probably post it on my site http://www.agirloutthere.blogspot.com/ Had there been a place to leave comments to your writings, I might not have posted this email letter elsewhere, but I think writings such as these demand discussion. There is some truth in what you are writing (as well as what the others and what I’m writing), but there is a whole heck of a lotta’ human up in there, too.

Matthew 6
1TAKE CARE not to do your good deeds publicly or before men, in order to be seen by them; otherwise you will have no reward [[a]reserved for and awaiting you] with and from your Father Who is in heaven.
2Thus, whenever you give to the poor, do not blow a trumpet before you, as the hypocrites in the synagogues and in the streets like to do, that they may be [b]recognized and honored and praised by men. Truly I tell you, they have their reward [c]in full already.
3But when you give to charity, do not let your left hand know what your right hand is doing,
4So that your deeds of charity may be in secret; and your Father Who sees in secret will reward you openly.
5Also when you pray, you must not be like the hypocrites, for they love to pray standing in the synagogues and on the corners of the streets, that they may be seen by people. Truly I tell you, they have their reward [d]in full already.
6But when you pray, go into your [most] private room, and, closing the door, pray to your Father, Who is in secret; and your Father, Who sees in secret, will reward you in the open.
7And when you pray, do not heap up phrases (multiply words, repeating the same ones over and over) as the Gentiles do, for they think they will be heard for their much speaking. [I Kings 18:25-29.]
8Do not be like them, for your Father knows what you need before you ask Him.
9Pray, therefore, like this: Our Father Who is in heaven, hallowed (kept holy) be Your name.
10Your kingdom come, Your will be done on earth as it is in heaven.
11Give us this day our daily bread.
12And forgive us our debts, as we also have forgiven ([e]left, remitted, and let go of the debts, and have [f]given up resentment against) our debtors.
13And lead (bring) us not into temptation, but deliver us from the evil one. For Yours is the kingdom and the power and the glory forever. Amen.
14For if you forgive people their trespasses [their [g]reckless and willful sins, [h]leaving them, letting them go, and [i]giving up resentment], your heavenly Father will also forgive you.
15But if you do not forgive others their trespasses [their [j]reckless and willful sins, [k]leaving them, letting them go, and [l]giving up resentment], neither will your Father forgive you your trespasses.
16And whenever you are fasting, do not look gloomy and [m]sour and [n]dreary like the hypocrites, for they put on a dismal countenance, that their fasting may be apparent to and seen by men. Truly I say to you, they have their reward [o]in full already.(A)
17But when you fast, perfume your head and wash your face,
18So that your fasting may not be noticed by men but by your Father, Who sees in secret; and your Father, Who sees in secret, will reward you in the open.
19Do not [p]gather and heap up and store up for yourselves treasures on earth, where moth and rust and worm consume and destroy, and where thieves break through and steal.
20But [q]gather and heap up and store for yourselves treasures in heaven, where neither moth nor rust nor worm consume and destroy, and where thieves do not break through and steal;
21For where your treasure is, there will your heart be also.
22The eye is the lamp of the body. So if your eye is sound, your entire body will be full of light.
23But if your eye is unsound, your whole body will be full of darkness. If then the very light in you [your [r]conscience] is darkened, how dense is that darkness!
24No one can serve two masters; for either he will hate the one and love the other, or he will stand by and be devoted to the one and despise and be [s]against the other. You cannot serve God and mammon ([t]deceitful riches, money, possessions, or [u]whatever is trusted in).
25Therefore I tell you, stop being [v]perpetually uneasy (anxious and worried) about your life, what you shall eat or what you shall drink; or about your body, what you shall put on. Is not life greater [in quality] than food, and the body [far above and more excellent] than clothing?
26Look at the birds of the air; they neither sow nor reap nor gather into barns, and yet your heavenly Father keeps feeding them. Are you not worth much more than they?
27And who of you by worrying and being anxious can add one unit of measure (cubit) to his stature or to the [w]span of his life?(B)
28And why should you be anxious about clothes? Consider the lilies of the field and [x]learn thoroughly how they grow; they neither toil nor spin.
29Yet I tell you, even Solomon in all his [y]magnificence (excellence, dignity, and grace) was not arrayed like one of these. [I Kings 10:4-7.]
30But if God so clothes the grass of the field, which today is alive and green and tomorrow is tossed into the furnace, will He not much more surely clothe you, O you of little faith?
31Therefore do not worry and be anxious, saying, What are we going to have to eat? or, What are we going to have to drink? or, What are we going to have to wear?
32For the Gentiles (heathen) wish for and crave and diligently seek all these things, and your heavenly Father knows well that you need them all.
33But seek ([z]aim at and strive after) first of all His kingdom and His righteousness ([aa]His way of doing and being right), and then all these things [ab]taken together will be given you besides.
34So do not worry or be anxious about tomorrow, for tomorrow will have worries and anxieties of its own. Sufficient for each day is its own trouble.




Matthew 9
View commentary related to this passage
Matthew 9
1AND JESUS, getting into a boat, crossed to the other side and came to His own town [Capernaum].
2And behold, they brought to Him a man paralyzed and prostrated by illness, lying on a sleeping pad; and when Jesus saw their faith, He said to the paralyzed man, Take courage, son; your sins are forgiven and the [a]penalty remitted.
3And behold, some of the scribes said to themselves, This man blasphemes [He claims the rights and prerogatives of God]!
4But Jesus, knowing ([b]seeing) their thoughts, said, Why do you think evil and harbor [c]malice in your hearts?
5For which is easier: to say, Your sins are forgiven and the [d]penalty remitted, or to say, Get up and walk?
6But in order that you may know that the Son of Man has authority on earth to forgive sins and [e]remit the penalty, He then said to the paralyzed man, Get up! Pick up your sleeping pad and go to your own house.
7And he got up and went away to his own house.
8When the crowds saw it, they were struck with fear and awe; and they [f]recognized God and praised and thanked Him, Who had given such power and authority to men.
9As Jesus passed on from there, He saw a man named Matthew sitting at the tax collector's office; and He said to him, [g]Be My disciple [side with My party and follow Me]. And he rose and followed Him.
10And as Jesus reclined at table in the house, behold, many tax collectors and [h][especially wicked] sinners came and sat (reclined) with Him and His disciples.
11And when the Pharisees saw this, they said to His disciples, Why does your Master eat with tax collectors and those [preeminently] sinful?
12But when Jesus heard it, He replied, Those who are strong and well (healthy) have no need of a physician, but those who are weak and sick.
13Go and learn what this means: I desire mercy [that is, [i]readiness to help those in trouble] and not sacrifice and sacrificial victims. For I came not to call and invite [to repentance] the righteous (those who are upright and in right standing with God), but sinners (the erring ones and all those not free from sin).(A)
14Then the disciples of John came to Jesus, inquiring, Why is it that we and the Pharisees fast [j]often, [that is, abstain from food and drink as a religious exercise], but Your disciples do not fast?
15And Jesus replied to them, Can the wedding guests mourn while the bridegroom is still with them? The days will come when the bridegroom is taken away from them, and then they will fast.
16And no one puts a piece of cloth that has not been shrunk on an old garment, for such a patch tears away from the garment and a worse rent (tear) is made.
17Neither is new wine put in old wineskins; for if it is, the skins burst and are [k]torn in pieces, and the wine is spilled and the skins are ruined. But new wine is put into fresh wineskins, and so both are preserved.
18While He was talking this way to them, behold, a ruler entered and, kneeling down, worshiped Him, saying, My daughter has just [l]now died; but come and lay Your hand on her, and she will come to life.
19And Jesus got up and accompanied him, with His disciples.
20And behold, a woman who had suffered from a flow of blood for twelve years came up behind Him and touched the fringe of His garment;(B)
21For she kept saying to herself, If I only touch His garment, I shall be restored to health.
22Jesus turned around and, seeing her, He said, Take courage, daughter! Your faith has made you well. And at once the woman was restored to health.
23And when Jesus came to the ruler's house and saw the flute players and the crowd making an uproar and din,
24He said, Go away; for the girl is not dead but sleeping. And they laughed and jeered at Him.
25But when the crowd had been ordered to go outside, He went in and took her by the hand, and the girl arose.
26And the news about this spread through all that district.
27As Jesus passed on from there, two blind men followed Him, shouting loudly, Have pity and mercy on us, Son of David!
28When He reached the house and went in, the blind men came to Him, and Jesus said to them, Do you believe that I am able to do this? They said to Him, Yes, Lord.
29Then He touched their eyes, saying, According to your faith and trust and reliance [on the power invested in Me] be it done to you;
30And their eyes were opened. And Jesus earnestly and sternly charged them, See that you let no one know about this.
31But they went off and blazed and spread His fame abroad throughout that whole district.
32And while they were going away, behold, a dumb man under the power of a demon was brought to Jesus.
33And when the demon was driven out, the dumb man spoke; and the crowds were stunned with bewildered wonder, saying, Never before has anything like this been seen in Israel.
34But the Pharisees said, He drives out demons through and with the help of the prince of demons.
35And Jesus went about all the cities and villages, teaching in their synagogues and proclaiming the good news (the Gospel) of the kingdom and curing all kinds of disease and every weakness and infirmity.
36When He saw the throngs, He was moved with pity and sympathy for them, because they were bewildered (harassed and distressed and dejected and helpless), like sheep without a shepherd.(C)
37Then He said to His disciples, The harvest is indeed plentiful, but the laborers are few.
38So pray to the Lord of the harvest to [m]force out and thrust laborers into His harvest.


John 4
1NOW WHEN the Lord knew (learned, became aware) that the Pharisees had been told that Jesus was winning and baptizing more disciples than John--
2Though Jesus Himself did not baptize, but His disciples--
3He left Judea and returned to Galilee.
4It was necessary for Him to go through Samaria.
5And in doing so, He arrived at a Samaritan town called Sychar, near the tract of land that Jacob gave to his son Joseph.
6And Jacob's well was there. So Jesus, tired as He was from His journey, sat down [to rest] by the well. It was then about the sixth hour (about noon).
7Presently, when a woman of Samaria came along to draw water, Jesus said to her, Give Me a drink--
8For His disciples had gone off into the town to buy food--
9The Samaritan woman said to Him, How is it that [a]You, being a Jew, ask me, a Samaritan [and a] woman, for a drink?--For the Jews have nothing to do with the Samaritans--
10Jesus answered her, If you had only known and had recognized God's gift and Who this is that is saying to you, Give Me a drink, you would have asked Him [instead] and He would have given you living water.
11She said to Him, Sir, You have nothing to draw with [no drawing bucket] and the well is deep; how then can You provide living water? [Where do You get Your living water?]
12Are You greater than and superior to our ancestor Jacob, who gave us this well and who used to drink from it himself, and his sons and his cattle also?
13Jesus answered her, All who drink of this water will be thirsty again.
14But whoever takes a drink of the water that I will give him shall never, no never, be thirsty any more. But the water that I will give him shall become a spring of water welling up (flowing, bubbling) [continually] within him unto (into, for) eternal life.
15The woman said to Him, Sir, give me this water, so that I may never get thirsty nor have to come [continually all the way] here to draw.
16At this, Jesus said to her, Go, call your husband and come back here.
17The woman answered, I have no husband. Jesus said to her, You have spoken truly in saying, I have no husband.
18For you have had five husbands, and the man you are now living with is not your husband. In this you have spoken truly.
19The woman said to Him, Sir, I see and understand that You are a prophet.
20Our forefathers worshiped on this mountain, but you [Jews] say that Jerusalem is the place where it is necessary and proper to worship.
21Jesus said to her, Woman, believe Me, a time is coming when you will worship the Father neither [merely] in this mountain nor [merely] in Jerusalem.
22You [Samaritans] do not know what you are worshiping [you worship what you do not comprehend]. We do know what we are worshiping [we worship what we have knowledge of and understand], for [after all] salvation comes from [among] the Jews.
23A time will come, however, indeed it is already here, when the true (genuine) worshipers will worship the Father in spirit and in truth (reality); for the Father is seeking just such people as these as His worshipers.
24God is a Spirit (a spiritual Being) and those who worship Him must worship Him in spirit and in truth (reality).
25The woman said to Him, I know that Messiah is coming, He Who is called the Christ (the Anointed One); and when He arrives, He will tell us everything we need to know and make it clear to us.
26Jesus said to her, I Who now speak with you am He.
27Just then His disciples came and they wondered (were surprised, astonished) to find Him talking with a woman [a married woman]. However, not one of them asked Him, What are You inquiring about? or What do You want? or, Why do You speak with her?
28Then the woman left her water jar and went away to the town. And she began telling the people,
29Come, see a Man Who has told me everything that I ever did! Can this be [is not this] the Christ? [Must not this be the Messiah, the Anointed One?]
30So the people left the town and set out to go to Him.
31Meanwhile, the disciples urged Him saying, Rabbi, eat something.
32But He assured them, I have food (nourishment) to eat of which you know nothing and have no idea.
33So the disciples said one to another, Has someone brought Him something to eat?
34Jesus said to them, My food (nourishment) is to do the will (pleasure) of Him Who sent Me and to accomplish and completely finish His work.
35Do you not say, It is still four months until harvest time comes? Look! I tell you, raise your eyes and observe the fields and see how they are already white for harvesting.
36Already the reaper is getting his wages [he who does the cutting now has his reward], for he is gathering fruit (crop) unto life eternal, so that he who does the planting and he who does the reaping may rejoice together.
37For in this the saying holds true, One sows and another reaps.
38I sent you to reap a crop for which you have not toiled. Other men have labored and you have stepped in to reap the results of their work.
39Now numerous Samaritans from that town believed in and trusted in Him because of what the woman said when she declared and testified, He told me everything that I ever did.
40So when the Samaritans arrived, they asked Him to remain with them, and He did stay there two days.
41Then many more believed in and adhered to and relied on Him because of His personal message [what He Himself said].
42And they told the woman, Now we no longer believe (trust, have faith) just because of what you said; for we have heard Him ourselves [personally], and we know that He truly is the Savior of the world, the Christ.
43But after these two days Jesus went on from there into Galilee--
44Although He Himself declared that a prophet has no honor in his own country.
45However, when He came into Galilee, the Galileans also welcomed Him and took Him to their hearts eagerly, for they had seen everything that He did in Jerusalem during the Feast; for they too had attended the Feast.
46So Jesus came again to Cana of Galilee, where He had turned the water into wine. And there was a certain royal official whose son was lying ill in Capernaum.
47Having heard that Jesus had come back from Judea into Galilee, he went away to meet Him and began to beg Him to come down and cure his son, for he was lying at the point of death.
48Then Jesus said to him, Unless you see signs and miracles happen, you [people] never will believe (trust, have faith) at all.
49The king's officer pleaded with Him, Sir, do come down at once before my little child is dead!
50Jesus answered him, Go in peace; your son will live! And the man put his trust in what Jesus said and started home.
51But even as he was on the road going down, his servants met him and reported, saying, Your son lives!
52So he asked them at what time he had begun to get better. They said, Yesterday during the seventh hour (about one o'clock in the afternoon) the fever left him.
53Then the father knew that it was at that very hour when Jesus had said to him, Your son will live. And he and his entire household believed (adhered to, trusted in, and relied on Jesus).
54This is the second sign (wonderwork, miracle) that Jesus performed after He had come out of Judea into Galilee.

Saturday, November 26, 2005

Thanks

Brent
Emily
Nancy
Liza
Sam
Janette
Barbie
Bree
Chris

Thursday, November 10, 2005

Throwing a Hail Mary


I want to know what that is. If you don't know specifically, what do you think? I know things weren't that great between you and Grandma. What was it between you? Did she have something going on? Did you? I remember you drinking wine in the evening, while you made dinner, with dinner, while you cleaned up, and when you went to bed. Was that part of something? I remember you crying a lot in your room, but none of us ever knew why. Was that part of something? I remember you getting so mad at us girls. Was that part of something? I remember hearing about Grandma drinking something that made her so sick she had to go to the hospital. Was that part of something? I have seen you and Uncle David and Sophie and myself completely rage. Is that part of something? You once told us girls that there was something you had wanted to talk with us about for sometime, but then it was dropped. Was that part of something? You once told me that Grandpa beat Grandma. Was that part of something?


I know it can't be.... well it's probably downright crappy feeling to read through this. I am sorry for that. My purpose is not to make YOU feel bad in any way. My purpose is to understand what's going on with me. I've been unhappy for quite some time now. I'm afraid to change things up...it might be the wrong change. I have recently discovered that I don't and many times can't trust others. I think it is this trust issue that stifles my relationship with and cripples my ability to love God, my husband, friends, family and you. I'm trying to work out this stuff in my life. Until now, I've been cutting off whatever is painful for me. Now I'm just pretty numb.


So this is why I'm asking all these questions. If you are offended or otherwise hurt, again I am sorry. If you decide not to address any of this, that's fine; you have to handle it for yourself. Well it won't quite be fine, as I'll still be at a loss, but I'm not going to hound you for answers or change our relationship. You have to be free to do this honestly.



Throwing a Hail Mary,

Your little girl